When I stood at the altar at 19 and said “I do” I never dreamed I’d be divorced one day. But life plays out and things happen and we each respond to those things and every response and every decision takes us to a destination. Some of the destinations are beautiful and some not so great.
I have learned to make the not so great places beautiful. You can live in a shack and turn it into a palace if you choose to. The house I live in is not the best place I have lived. Believe me I have lived in some beautiful homes and not so beautiful. I came home from work yesterday and my amazing daughter Kendall took it upon herself to open the gallon of yellow paint I had purchased and paint the hallway. What a difference a coat of sunshine yellow paint makes. My ugly little house transformed into a cute little cottage. A little paint here a little pain there, a plant here…and love everywhere. You know how it works.
The best decoration you can give any destination is love. Love covers over a multitude of sins. Yeshua told the rich young ruler to sell everything he had and give it to the poor. He said the greatest commandment was to love the Lord your God with all your heart all your strength and all your mind. He said to love your neighbor as yourself. I have a vivid memory of coming home from work one day. I opened the door and my eldest daughter Autumn was sitting on the couch looking sad and forlorn. When she looked up at me her face broke into sudden relief and she announced to her sisters: “Mommy is home.” In her words I bring a happy feeling when I come.
This past week my x husband had to have a pretty serious surgery. I got up early every morning and prayed for him. I drove him to the hospital and sat in the waiting area with his amazing girlfriend and my x in laws. We waited and laughed at some of the funny moments when the nurse asked which one if us was his wife. He got a funny grin on his face and said, Well this is my x wife and this is my girlfriend. When they asked him who was to make the decision concerning life support should the unthinkable happen, he said my x wife my girlfriend and my dad will decide together. And yes, if that had happened we could have decided together because we all had a common ground. We all love the man lying in the bed awaiting surgery. We all had a special unique love for him that superseded any awkward moment. Hatred, bitterness and revenge are not beautiful home improvements. There is no place for them in our lives.
Divorce is one of those not so great places. If you find yourself there, you can make some home improvements and turn it into a comfortable, loving and welcoming place. It’s truly the way things should be.
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About Me
- Denise Parton Plunk
- I live in Southern California. I am the mother of four beautiful daughters. The most amazing thing I did with my life was to trust it to the nature of God. To put my life into the hands of a God who totally loves me and delights in helping me. My inspiration for writing comes from many places. This quote always arouses the story teller in me. It's like in the great stories Mr. Frodo, the ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were and sometimes you didn't want to know the end because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end it's only a passing thing this shadow even darkness must pass. A new day will come and when the sun shines it'll shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you even if you were too small to understand why. But I think Mr. Frodo, I do understand I know now folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back only they didn't. They kept going because they were holding on to something. What are we holding onto Sam? That there's some good in the world Mr. Frodo, and it's worth fighting for.